Where to begin?

Its been 6 months since my last post, and Im not really sure where I should start.  Do I start with the biggest life altering event thus far in my life? Do I start with what came chronological?  Do I even post at all, because right now that just seems so daunting it?  Well,  Lets just start, and see what sort of stream of conscientiousness comes out.

I didnt see is as such, initially, but my sis-in-law made a comment in Feb about how 2013 was a crappy year.  I was sad for the next 10 months as they didnt have a lot of hope for being better.  Well.  Now I agree, and it only took me 2 more months.

In April, one day, and really in a mere handful of seconds, changed my life forever.  My baby brother was off on a motorcycle ride. My parents had asked him to join them for dinner on that Sunday evening, but the weather was nice and he got his bike working, so he wanted to go for a ride.  Sadly, he will never return home from that ride.

My parents received a call from the hospital,  that he had been in a serious accident.  While they drove to the hospital, the phones started go off around the country as we were informed of the situation.  The phones continued to buzz with calls and text messages as soon as they received any news.  But within a few hours of first hearing of the accident, we knew that without a serious act of God, Ben would no longer be with us.  It took hours of testing to really give the doctors all the proof they required.  With my parents choosing to have him become an organ donor, even more test than usual were required. Although it was determined that the accident caused him to become brain dead at the moment of impact, his day of death is not recorded until Wed, due to testing and lining up organ donors.

During the week, family starting arriving in Dallas.  Members of my parents congregation/ward cleaned the house, and provided food for the masses that were coming.  Many people stopped by their home to offer condolences. Friends of Ben came to feel of any last presence that his things might offer to them.

After deciding to drive with my older brother and his family, we arrived late Wed night.  Once we arrived, we were put on Memorial Service planning duties.  Collecting pictures, creating a program, printing, etc.  There were moments that I had to runaway.  I didnt want to be there.  I didnt want that to be my new reality.  I didnt want to deal with what was to come after it.  I kept waiting for Ben to walk in the back door and ask what everyone was doing there.  To wonder why siblings and cousins had invaded his house and his world.  Why all his precious metals were collected and taken to another home.  (He had a gun collected that he referred to has his precious metals!) Some how, I was the lucky one that had to sleep in his room.  It was hard to fall asleep in here.  It had been cleaned up, and looked much less like the room I had seen months earlier.  But I still was waiting for him to rip me from my slumber and ask what the hoopla was about.

The Memorial Service was perfect.  James did the Eulogy.  Ken did a religious talk.  My dad gave his thoughts.  Oh my poor Dad, loosing a second son now, along with a wife.  The chapel was full.  The overflow was full.  The gym had standing room only.  It was so heart warming to know that Ben touched many, many people in his short 24 years on this earth.

There is more to share.  But I just want to leave it at that for now, and this to remind ourselves that we never know when it is our time to return to our Father in Heaven.  Be the best that you know how to be.  Be the person you know to be.


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I was able to spend sometime with Hurricane Sandy clean up.  So many people were devastated by the effects of Sandy, and Im so grateful I was able to help make a few people/families loads lighter.  I spent most of my time cleaning basements, and tearing out flooring and walls.  Nothing glamorous, but necessities for the home owners.  I was able to help a divorced lady who lost her brother in 9/11.  I was able to help families that have spent generations on the area, having never before seen such rage by Mother Nature.  I was great to work along side ward members, and friends alike.  To even make new friends.

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Swing dancing is still a passion of mine.  I was able to make it to Lindy Focus in Asheville, NC between Christmas and New Years, and even went to Orlando for dancing in March.  I keep thinking that one day, Ill actually get good, but for now, I just like doing it.


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I love being back close enough to keep up with these growing busy bodies!  Love them, and little Luke, not pictured. I was able to have a  slumber party in the city with them.  Good times!


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This is the first time that I have lived somewhere for the second time.  I dont want to talk much about it, but I will say, things are not always best the second time around.  Especially in a place were daily living and life chores are just simply harder to accomplish.  I grateful for my job and the opportunities that it gives me, but pray that the next opportunities might be some where else. :/


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In Feb, I went to Austin to celebrate this little cutie turning 1!  She is so darling.  Loved being with her and her parents.  She has a smile that can just melt your heart, and loving personality.  They have taught her sign language, and its so cute to see how much she asks for her Dad.  She loves to be with him.  .. .  And so glad that they are moving to the east coast!  More visits in the future.

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And lastly, I wont be surprised if I dont have any readers by this point.  But if I do, Im glad there is someone!  :)